That is a good one! Thanks for the laugh!!!!!!!!!

 

didnt you see the post...it was ndnboy

 

Oh, I thought he was joking...

 

hahaha, that was one of the funniest things I've read in awhile. Thanks for make my day a little better Glen and Aussie.

 

IWAS joking, but with the popularity of this forum he better hope it wasn't a mustang that got all those tickets, LOL.

 

haha, i can picture him doing something like that

 

My parents are retired and what they mainly do is S.K.I.ing which means spending kids inheritance, I say go for it myself they have worked hard, been prudent so why not and me and my sis are OK financial so that is what i plan to do when older as well.

 

I put myself through college by working at the state mental institution in Austin then taught school for 36 years. Now, I no longer have an alarm clock, and I can eat whenever I get hungry, not at a specified time. I can wax my cars one fender at a time and not have to hurry through a project. I can read all the books that I didn't have time to read when I was working, and I can get up at 2 in the morning and pour myself a glass of Chianti and type this. Life is good.

 

My father retired two years ago, about half way into the first year he goes stir crazy, takes out a loan, opens up a contractor business and now builds houses, talk about working yourself to death.

 

My Wife sent me this in an e-mail last week ...enjoy

How a woman does an oil change:
1) Pull up to Jiffy Lube when the mileage reaches 3000 miles
since the last oil change.
2) Drink a cup of coffee.
3) 15 minutes later, write a check and leave with a properly
maintained vehicle.

Money spent:
Oil Change $20.00
Coffee $1.00
Total $21.00
================================================== ========
How a man does it:

1) Wait until Saturday, drive to auto parts store and buy a
case
of oil. a new oil filter, and a bag of kitty litter.
write a
check for $50.00.
2) Stop by 7/11 and buy a case of beer, write a check for
$20,
drive
home.
3) Open a beer and drink it.
4) Jack car up. Spend 30 minutes looking for jack stands.
5) Find jack stands under kid's pedal car.
6) In frustration, open another beer and drink it.
7) Place drain pan under engine.
Look for 9/16 box end wrench.
9) Give up and use crescent wrench.
11) Drop drain plug in pan of hot oil: splash hot oil on you
in process. Cuss.
12) Crawl out from under car to wipe hot oil off of face and
arms.
Throw kitty litter on spilled oil.
13) Have another beer while watching oil drain.
14) Spend 30 minutes looking for oil filter wrench.
15) Give up; crawl under car and hammer a screwdriver through
oil
filter and twist off.
16) Crawl out from under car with dripping oil filter
splashing
oil
everywhere from holes. Cleverly hide old oil filter among
trash
in
trash can to avoid environmental penalties. Drink a beer.
17) Install new oil filter making sure to apply a thin coat
of
oil
to
gasket surface.
1 Dump first quart of fresh oil into engine.
19) Remember drain plug from step 11.
20) Hurry to find drain plug in drain pan.
21) Drink beer.
22) Discover that first quart of fresh oil is now on the floor.
Throw
kitty litter on oil spill.
23) Get drain plug back in with only a minor spill. Drink beer.
24) Crawl under car getting kitty litter into eyes. Wipe eyes
with
oily
rag used to clean drain plug. Slip with stupid crescent
wrench tightening drain plug and bang knuckles on frame
removing any
excess
skin between knuckles and frame.
25) Begin cussing fit.
26) Throw stupid crescent wrench.
27) Cuss for additional 5 minutes because wrench hit bowling
trophy.
2 Beer.
29) Clean up hands and bandage as required to stop blood flow.
30) Beer.
31) Dump in five fresh quarts of oil.
32) Beer.
33) Lower car from jack stands.
34) Move car back to apply more kitty litter to fresh oil
spilled
during any missed steps.
35) Beer.
36) Test drive car.
37) Get pulled over: arrested for driving under the influence.
3 Car gets impounded.
39) Call loving wife, make bail.
40) 12 hours later, get car from impound yard.

Money spent:
Parts $50.00
DUI $2500.00
Impound fee $75.00
Bail $1500.00
Beer $20.00
Total -- $4,145.00

But you know the job was done right!