OK I was a dumbass and tried to drive through standing water. My engine will not start and I believe has water in it. What should I do?
Help!

 

How deep was the water?If you got water in or around some sensors they could give false readings and not allow the engine to start.
If you got water in the engine while it was running you could have gotten "hydraulic lock".This is when the engine gets water inside the combustion chamber and usually destroys the engine.Bent rods,holes in pistons,and possibly bent valves can all result.
If it's just electrical you will need to let everything dry out.If you drove through salt water you will have to wash everything off or corrosion of the electrical system will continue forever.
If you just ened up with water in the fuel tank then drain and refill the tank.A new fuel filter is mandatory.You might want to remove the injectors and clean them also.

 

Hoping you did not already damage something with water in the cylinders, you should take the spark plugs out and turn the engine over several times to pump out any water in the cylinders.

 

use wire dryer. check the oil to see if it is milky, if it is change it and the filter. if the air filter is wet replace it as well. if the oil was milky and you get it running you should change the oil a few more times. good luck